Jared Leary

If I'm going to be honest,

I didn't actually expect

anyone to look up this website.

Hopefully you weren't expecting

anything big because you won't

be getting that.

Kudos to you, I guess

and congratulations for being

so unrelenting in the search

for my secrets.

Do tell me if you find this

and share the secret code

word "defenestrate"

and I'll give you a bonus treat.

Disclaimer: If I run out of candy,

then I'm afraid that you won't get anything.